Casting out Fear

For many years now, I have struggled with fear. As a child, I was afraid of literally everything. Whether it was spiders, flies (they sounded like bees), the faucet that resembled a face, or the coat rack in the hallway which terrorized me in nightmares throughout my childhood; you name it, I was probably afraid of it. 

As I have grown and matured, my list of things that terrify me has shrunk considerably, but as I stare the possibility of living on my own squarely in the face, there is one fear I simply must conquer. --I absolutely dread being in the house by myself after dark. 

Now, being a grown-up sort of person, it does happen that I am at home by myself after dark periodically, and I have improved some since that first time when my parents were called away to the hospital and I stayed awake in terror all night till they got back. And it’s not as if I have any traumatic experience of bad things happening when I have stayed alone before. –I just have a very active imagination, and I was not discerning as to what I fed it with in my youth. 

So, I will be going along, minding my own business at home alone when suddenly a noise or random thought will trigger a memory of a scenario I have seen or heard of or read about and my mind is instantly planning my response to the  situation, even though it isn’t actually what is happening. Then my heart starts racing right along with my mind and then I suddenly notice every noise the house makes, each one triggering its own avalanche of what-ifs. 

Now, it might be argued that fear is a natural emotion, and that there’s nothing we can do about it. The vast number of commands in the Bible to “fear not” make it clear that God (who designed us) expects us to choose not to fear. For years, I have struggled to understand just how to do that.

Then at Family Camp this year our preacher made a statement that hit me so hard I was left nearly breathless at the simplicity and power of it. He said that the answer to fear is God.

Think about it. When we give in to fear, we are in fact choosing not to trust that God is able and willing to protect us. 

Up to this point, the main thing I have turned to as a way to stave off fear has been the television. I grew up with the television always on, and it is very difficult not to turn on the TV to “drown out” the noises that trigger the what-ifs. Interestingly enough, it doesn’t actually work. In fact, it makes it worse, because I will still think I hear something, but not be sure if I did or not because of the tv, and that triggers a whole new set of what-ifs.

I now realize that I was trusting the TV or other people to provide my sense of security, instead of simply trusting that in my need for security, as well as all else, God is enough.    

Can I say that again?

God is enough.

To be fearful in the face of the reality of His presence with me is to be like a small child, closing his eyes and believing that he cannot be seen. 

This weekend, my new determination to conquer fear was tested. It wasn’t a situation in which I was actually in danger, but I could have been, and the what-ifs began to pop into my mind. With the first what-if, I made a conscious choice not to follow that train of thought, and instead to direct my thoughts to God and the truth of His presence with me. At every step, there was a new tempting thought, and I had to decide again to fight it with truth. It was a hard battle, but it worked, and I got into my car feeling the freedom of having won a victory. 

Now, I have by no means arrived, and I will still have to battle, but I feel now that I know how to fight, and that victory is attainable with God’s help. 

I John 4:18 says, “There is no fear in love; but perfect love casteth out fear: because fear hath torment. He that feareth is not made perfect in love.”

God doesn’t want us to live in fear. He wants us to let His love for us cast out our fears.